Forgiveness…it looks like a fairly simple
word, but then again, look closer and there are layers and layers of meaning to
it. So, what’s exactly forgiveness? The Merriam-Webster defines the term ‘forgive’ as ‘to cease to feel resentment against (an offender)’. So, I ask
myself this very question, “Can I really cease to feel resentment against a
person who has really, really offended me?” Surprise! Surprise! ( I am being
sarcastic here), quite honestly, the answer is a big NO.
It’s really, really
tough to forgive. As a person, who feels rather strongly about even the
smallest things, forgiving somebody for a really big let-down seems rather
remote, in fact, downright impossible. I
was faced with a situation a few months back, where forgiveness was the only
remedial measure that could make things right. There was just no other way out.
So, my habituated Christian brain that
was so used to hearing about forgiveness every Sunday morning decided to just
do it. But then again, just doing it was not as easy as just saying it. I tried
and tried, but the anger, the hurt and the disappointment just followed me
around. That’s when, I decided to look for answers in the one place that gives
numerous options. Yes..I googled forgiveness. And I did get way too many
answers. Oprah Winfrey, my all-time favourite talk show host, for one gave a
very interesting take on the word ‘forgiveness’. She says “Forgiveness doesn't
mean you condone the behaviour or, in any way, make a wrong right. It just
means you give yourself permission to release from your past -- and step
forward with the mud of resentment cleared from your wings. Fly!” Nice…so I
decided to clear my wings of mud and just fly! Again, easier said than done.
The concept of forgiveness is crystal-clear but it’s the execution that’s just
so tough.
It was, then, that I decided to look up the
Bible for help with my forgiveness project. In Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus tells
Peter, you just don’t forgive your seven times but seventy seven times. Very
impressive, but is it at all possible, I wonder. As I prodded on, I came across
a few other verses that gave me hope. In Colossians 3:13,
Paul says, ‘Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may
have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.’ The verse talks
of forgiveness as a choice that you make. God could have easily disowned this
sinful world, but he chose not to do it. Instead, he chose to send his Son to
deliver the message of forgiveness and redemption. In the same way, we have the
choice to forgive and let go of grudges or hold on to them and disown those who
hurt us.
Ok,
I choose to forgive. But how do I do it even when I don’t really feel like it?
It’s difficult with all the anger and hurt going around. That’s where faith
comes to play. Luke 5:20 goes like this.
When Jesus saw their faith, he said,
"Friend, your sins are forgiven." By faith in Lord’s ability to heal
our hearts, we learn to forgive and accept others as they are. And if you need
the strength of will to repair the broken strands of a relationship, our
awesome God can give that, too. By strength from God ‘With God nothing is impossible.’
With faith you can not only move mountains, you can also get over hurt and
disappointment. Again, if you require the will-power to forgive and forget,
look up to the Lord, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (and
my ever-failing will!) Yes, with the Lord’s help, all things are possible,
including forgiveness.
All of us want to be forgiven for our sins,
but we don’t forgive that easily. Sometimes, we do say ‘all is forgiven’ even
as we nurse a tinge of anger in the heart. Yes…we are humans and its naturally
to do so. But, it doesn’t need to be that way. Anger and hatred preys on our
mental, physical, emotional health. The Bible shows the surefire way to forgive
and free ourselves of the guilt, pain and hurt. Where we cannot work, God
works!
